Christmas Nostalgia

Nostalgia is the good feeling you get when you remember things from your past.

Wikipedia’s says: The term nostalgia describes a yearning for the past, often in an idealized form. The word is a learned formation of a Greek compound, consisting of (nóstos), meaning "returning home", a Homeric word, and (álgos), meaning "pain, ache". It was described as a medical condition, a form of melancholy in the Early Modern period and later an important trope in Romanticism.

For me, nostalgia represents the "good old days”, an image, a smell, a song, a tradition or some simple memory from my childhood. Nostalgia makes me sit back and smile and think, wow, that was fun. Most of my days are usually filled with routine activities that aren't significant – commuting to work, buying groceries, or sweeping the floor. When Christmas rolls around, I am particularly nostalgic, and I guess I tap into the past to remind me that my life is meaningful, that I have values and good relationships.

It seems like this time of year is so busy, so chaotic and so stressful for everyone. I started to think of years ago when Christmas was a magical time. We didn't get many presents BUT we never expected to, either, so the ones we did get were special. And it all started with the Advent calendar we hung on the wall or cupboard. Each of us kids taking a turn to open a new day on the calendar, counting each day, and waiting for the birth of Jesus on Christmas day.

I remember getting a big beautiful wide eyed doll just like one I had seen in a store window - couldn't believe she was actually mine that Christmas morning! And then there was the Christmas when I received 2 very special monkeys, one red, one black. I still have one, minus one arm, they were my treasures.

I remember one year being so excited when I opened a package with a blue velvet dress, handmade by my mom. She was sewing late on Christmas Eve, a red velvet dress for my sister Joan, and I had wished she was really making me one instead. Obviously she had, and who knows how long into the night she sewed to get both of them done. My mother was unfairly widowed in her early forties, and I know she sacrificed a lot to put anything under the tree - no credit cards in those days - everyone lived within their means and even us children knew the limits. I remember mom giving me some coins to do my own Christmas shopping. Sometimes I would find a teacup in the thrift store for .10c other times a little hankie. Always something simple for mom, and she was always pleased with the little gifts; and I spent wisely. When I think back to the times we ate noodles and prunes, or sauce on toast for dinner several days a week, it was my Mom's way of insuring gifts under that tree.

It was a favourite holiday, and we always had Christmas music in the house. I remember the Jim Reeves and Burl Ives songs my mother played, and our house smelled like Christmas for days before and after. Evergreen forest smell from the live tree we would decorate with our old special decorations. Some were homemade, like this hollow egg shell turned into Santa. It's a treasure I keep that is more than 50 years old now.

Then there was the smell of shortbread baking in the oven and chocolate doodads on the counter, roasting turkey (that usually came from a Christmas hamper we would receive from the Kinsmen each year), plum pudding and even candle wax. A big part of Christmas was midnight mass. I would have to have a nap at 9pm so my mom could wake me at 11pm to get ready for church. Then there was the beautiful choir singing carols, followed by high mass and incense – more sounds, smells and memories. To this day I cry when I hear certain carols and I wonder why. It was Silent Night that brought it on this Christmas mass. A hidden nostalgia no doubt.

The other part of Christmas was the extended family---aunts, uncles and cousins, and of course my grammy Bukowsky was usually with us as well, usually wearing a classy caftan and big clip-on earings. Despite bickering or crowding, there was always an extra card table that could be opened up for a few more to sit around at dinner time, and somehow the walls always were elastic. Now many of these people have passed on, and others have gone their own way, but the gathering and enjoying of one another are still precious memories, and part of my Christmas nostalgia.

Christmas was special in those days - no expectations, just genuine happiness over what we did receive. We were more selfless and more kind. The house was warm and we had clothes to wear. It was all simpler then, we were happy with a board game or home-made clothes. Now parents feel they have to buy their kids the latest, greatest, most expensive toys, clothes or gadgets. It's sad. I hear people say they want a simpler Christmas. Well, don't buy those expensive gifts - don't even start that tradition. Go back to the basics. We all can create the simpler, more innocent days of Christmas, no matter how old or young we are.